Sex therapist offering teletherapy in CALIFORNIA

Couples Therapy & Sex Therapy for ANYONE Ready to Rebuild, Reconnect, and Reclaim Intimacy

A compassionate space where you can deepen your emotional and sexual connection, heal what's been broken, and grow together in ways that truly honor who you are, your values, your identities, and the unique journey you're on, both individually and as a couple.

Dr. Adrian Scharfetter, PhD, LMFT, CST-S
License # 113824

intimacy issues

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mixed libido

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communication issues

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sexual health

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Desire Mismatch

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Decreased sexual function

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BDSM and kink affirming

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Boundaries

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intimacy issues ◇ mixed libido ◇ communication issues ◇ sexual health ◇ Desire Mismatch ◇ Decreased sexual function ◇ BDSM and kink affirming ◇ Boundaries ◇

I am very glad you are here!

I'm here to help you reconnect, with yourself, with each other, and with what truly matters in your relationship.

If you're feeling stuck, distant, or unsure of the path forward, couples therapy can become a place where healing happens, closeness returns, and hope is renewed.

I deeply honor your unique story both the one you share together and the ones you carry individually, and I'll walk alongside you through whatever challenges you're facing, with compassion, understanding, and a true partnership in your growth.

I work with all types of clients, including:

✓ Individuals seeking clarity and meaning around their
sexual health and needs
✓ Monogamous and non-monogamous partnerships
✓ LGBTQIA+ and queer couples navigating relationships
✓ Long-term and newly committed relationships
✓ Couples exploring kink, polyamory, or open relationships
✓ Partners navigating parenting, neurodiversity, or life transitions
✓ Individuals and couples in alternative lifestyles or cultures

Common Challenges Include:

  • Communication breakdowns and conflict cycles

  • Mismatched desire and sexual disconnection

  • Infidelity, betrayal trauma, and ruptured trust

  • Performance anxiety, shame, or body-based barriers

  • Negotiating non-monogamy or new relationship agreements

  • Emotional distance, resentment, or loss of passion

  • Rebuilding intimacy after a rupture

MY services:

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  • Dr. Adrian Scharfetter offers depth-oriented, integrative psychotherapy for individuals and couples. Sessions often weave together sex therapy, relationship counseling, Internal Family Systems (IFS), mindfulness, and attachment-based work. For some clients and situations, I also offer ketamine-assisted therapy and retreat-style intensives to deepen healing and transformation.

  • My approach blends clinical expertise with soulful depth work, helping clients explore not only behavior and communication but also the unconscious patterns, archetypes, and inner parts shaping intimacy and self-expression. Therapy is not just symptom management; it’s a process of growth, integration, and meaning-making.

  • Couples therapy focuses on repair, communication, and reconnection. Using approaches like PACT, EFT, and IFS, we help partners move from reactive cycles into secure, attuned connection. Whether you’re recovering from conflict, betrayal, or emotional distance, couples therapy provides a structured space to rebuild trust and intimacy. We talk and figure it out together in a warm and compassionate place.

  • As of January 2020, Athenian Counseling is no longer in-network with insurance providers. However, I can provide a superbill for potential reimbursement from your insurance company. Many clients also choose to pay privately for greater confidentiality and flexibility in treatment.

  • That’s more common than you might think. Many clients come to me after therapy that felt too surface-level or didn’t address underlying patterns. My work invites curiosity, emotional depth, and integration, focusing on lasting change rather than quick fixes.

  • You can schedule an appointment directly through our online booking page, or contact us via email or phone for availability. We’ll set up a brief consultation to determine if my therapeutic style and offerings is the right fit for your needs.

Other Services I offer:

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Ketamine-Assisted Therapy
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Psychedelic Therapy Integration
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Supervision & Consultation

my APPROACH

My work is rooted in respect, connection, and sustainable growth. I draw from:

  • Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): to shift negative interaction patterns

  • Internal Family Systems (IFS): to explore the “parts” each partner brings

  • Sex Therapy: to reignite erotic connection, pleasure, and safety

  • Nonviolent Communication (NVC): to foster understanding and empathy

  • Psychoeducation: to build shared language, insight, and skills

I help you move from stuckness to clarity, from defensiveness to empathy, from disconnect to deeper connection. If you would like to know more about the orientations I work with, click here.

Book a Consulation
“Dr. Scharfetter helped us reconnect during a time when intimacy felt hard. The approach felt gentle but effective, and we appreciated how much emphasis there was on safety, communication, and understanding, not pressure. We’re really grateful for the experience.”
— Steve L

Why Choose me for couples work or Individual work?

Credentials & Expertise

I'm an AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist (CST) and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist with over a decade of experience helping individuals and couples navigate their most intimate challenges. My approach is both evidence-based and deeply human, I bring specialized training in LGBTQ-affirming care, ethical non-monogamy, and kink-positive therapy, ensuring you feel seen and supported exactly as you are.

How I Work

My practice integrates relational, emotional, and somatic approaches to help you heal on multiple levels. I offer flexible session formats, including traditional weekly therapy and immersive Couples Intensives (3-hour, 6-hour, and multi-day options) for those seeking concentrated, transformative work. For clients interested in deeper therapeutic exploration, I also provide Ketamine-Assisted Therapy (KAP) for both individuals and couples.

What Sets This Work Apart

Beyond my training and credentials, what I bring to our work together is genuine warmth, empathetic understanding, and a commitment to creating real connection. I'm passionate about this work, and my clients consistently share that they feel truly heard and supported in our sessions.

THE PROCESS:

Your Relationship Deserves This Care

You don’t have to keep circling the same arguments or living with distance. Whether you're repairing, redefining, or reigniting your connection, couples therapy can be the turning point.

  • Book a consult call by scheduling here

  • We have a brief consult to go over any important questions or concerns

  • From our consult we can set up our first introduction session to start our work together

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Meet your Therapist

I’M DR. ADRIAN SCHARFETTER

If you're feeling disconnected, from your partner, your sexuality, or even yourself, I want you to know you're not alone. So many people I work with come in feeling stuck in patterns they can't quite put into words, carrying quiet shame or frustration around intimacy, communication, or desire. I truly get it. Not just as a therapist, but as someone who's seen again and again how powerful it is when we finally have a safe space to bring the parts of ourselves that have been ignored, dismissed, or misunderstood.

My work is really about helping you understand your own story, reconnect with what you actually need, and build relationships, with others and with yourself, that feel genuinely nourishing, authentic, and alive. You deserve that.

Learn more about me